Trading Spaces

So plot twist, the Ghana research team no longer . We were originally 3 but, one of our members moved out of the class leaving us one person short. Initially, I have to admit I was really upset that I wouldn’t get to research how the Pan-Africanism ideology impacts the success of global citizenship from the students of the Ghanaian school. It was the only school that had a transcontinental value involved with its students’ future paths. Not to mention my close ties to the country. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t let this disappointment cloud my judgement for what was to come next.

See, at the beginning of the semester Adam explained how there is too much data for just two people to tackle meaning now that we were only two, we had to choose another group to join. This also meant we would also have to choose a different country to research altogether. This presented two problems. One, we couldn’t work in the same group. And two, we would have to choose which country we wanted to join by the end of next class period which was two days away. For me it really meant that I had to figure out which country and which research question interested me the most. After going through the rest of the research teams’ questions, Australia interested me the most. The only problem was that my ex-partner was also interested in Australia. This is where the “uh -oh” moment happens since we couldn’t be in the same group. One of us would have to choose another group yet again. I really didn’t want to give up the chance of being in the Australia group because of their unique involvement with the Aboriginal people. Coincidentally, that was also the aspect that my ex-group partner liked.

To make a clear, fair decision on which one of us got to be in that group we played paper, rock, scissors for it. Sadly, I lost, leaving me to make a quick decision on which was the second most country I wanted to research. This wasn’t really a hard decision because I was only remotely interested in one other country which was Jordan. I wasn’t really that interested in the country. There was nothing that seemed to tie me in any relation to the Jordanian culture like with Ghana and Australia. No intra-African ties, which at the time I didn’t realize was what I was looking for in a country. But I knew I needed to make a quick decision on the spot, so I chose Jordan.

Now on top of regular class readings and assignments, I had to carve out time to go through yet another set of data that I know absolutely nothing about. I basically had to start all over again unsure how I would be able to do something like that in such a small amount of time. I had to learn the reasoning behind the research question for this country in which I had no involvement. I hate that. I really do. My actual interests aren’t really involved with this study anymore. I will say the Ghanaian and Jordanian system do share many of the original aspects of what I wanted to study, i.e. future paths of students in a global citizenship context. However, like I previously stated, it’s hard to find a passion and motivation when you are stuck researching something you really don’t have that much interest in. Furthermore, I felt like a nuisance now since my new group members had to redistribute the data for data analysis and start the coding process all over again. They didn’t ask for a new team member. They didn’t ask to be slowed down by me. The anxiety behind this change and the information it brings is the very thing hindering my level of interest. Just learning new codes and coming up with them was a separate affair that I had to get my mind and heart okay with doing on Jordan.

When one puts all of these aspects together, you can clearly see how my heart wouldn’t be in the project. Yet, this project counts for a huge chunk of my grade and deadlines and due dates don’t wait for anyone. So how do I find and increase my interest for Jordan? Will it happen while I am coding? Will it happen when we are discussing the relevant data for the research question? Or will it never happen? I guess that’s something I have yet to discover on this research study journey.