Who could have guessed he would choose
to spend so much of his time bent over
a shovel, one wrist so weak he wore
an ace bandage on it, his asthmatic lungs
forcing him to stop for breath again
and again. “Never mind,” he would say to us,
his three young stepsons, when we
stopped too, “get back to work.”
for a whole winter, we hauled cinders
from the paper mill to level the driveway.
That next spring he had us digging holes
for the barn’s corner posts, angry that we kept
fighting with each other in our anger
about the endlessness of banging our shovels
into the nearly frozen ground. Why did he
drive us that way? Why was he so hard
on himself, always the last one to come
in the house out of the dark.
we dug until we found ourselves inside
a waist-high trench he said would bring water
up from the river to the plants of his nursery.
“You’ll never get anywhere,” he told us,
“until you learn the meaning of work.”Above ground in the moonlight, as I return
through this poem, the tall grass has no idea
where we laid that pipe. The sprinkler system
for the nursery, dead for years, has forgotten why.
All the truckloads of fill we brought to prevent
the bank’s erosion are on their way down
into the river. In the back of the old barn,
its aluminum siding curled from the weather,
the shovels we once used stand upside down
against the wall in the window’s light like flowers,
making a kind of memorial to the work
we did then, some with blunted points, some
scalloped at the center, where after all those years
of shoveling, the shoveled themselves away.