Video Game Commentary: A Manifesto

Children of the digital age,

Let me share with you the gospel of video game commentary.

We have come far, from the pixelated dirt of the Oregon Trail to the battlefields of Halo 3.

Adhere to these commandments, and I promise that you will find a welcoming home in the red and white of youtube’s archives

 

For the Let’s Play producer:

Thou shalt cut out parts where you get stuck in the game

Thou shalt not use your commentary to talk about real life problems without a warning to your viewers

Thou shalt warn viewers of spoiling the plot of games

Thou shalt be spontaneous and keep the video entertaining

 

For the competitive play commentator:

Thou shalt provide in depth analysis of the meta-game

Thou shalt have a firm understanding of the game you are commentating on, unless you are producing satire

Explain the intricacies of the game so new players can learn from those with more experience

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_x62_d7DZA

 

For the comedic gameplay commentator:

Thou shalt use text to its full humorous potential: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYjCXjIeNJk

Thou should play with a friend to create more humorous conversations: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuGsRmEEx6s

 

And general rules for all to follow:

Thou shalt provide high quality videos in 720p resolution or higher

Thou shalt use a decent microphone to speak into.

 

Video game commentary is a huge part of the youtube community, and as technology spreads and improves, so will this genre. It is important that the new generations of content producers understand that the future is in their hands, and for the genre to grow in the best way possible, they must adhere to these rules, or be forever damned to the fiery reddish hell of having a large number of dislikes on their videos.